WBTV — CHARLOTTE, N.C. (QC Life) - Did you just get back into the dating scene and are unsure if your current dating partner is a good fit for you?
Laurie Berzack, owner of Carolinas Matchmaker and a dating and relationship coach, joined us to share with us three red and three green flags to look out for in your dating partners.
Since 2006, Berzack and her team of cupids have been helping singles in the Carolinas find love, offering Online Dating Management, Traditional Matchmaking for Men as well as an array of rotating programs, workshops, dating bootcamps and single events.
In addition to that, Berzack hosts a weekly podcast, Love on the Go, which is available on Apple, Spotify, and YouTube.
She put together a list of 3 red and 3 green flags to heed when you start dating:
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Red Flags
1. They are not communicating regularly
This can go one of two ways. If they text you non-stop throughout the day, this might point to your dating partner having obsessive or codependent tendencies. On the other hand, if the person you’re dating is constantly rescheduling or generally hard to get a hold of, they might not be right for you if you’re looking for a long-term relationship.
2. They are rushing intimacy
If you made clear you want to take things slow and your dating partner continues to pressure you into having sex nonetheless, that is a big red flag and extremely disrespectful. It signals that they’re either just looking for a one-night stand or have unhealthy sexual patterns. Either way, you shouldn’t tolerate that kind of behavior.
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3. They’re still focused on past relationships
If you notice them continuously bringing up their past relationships in conversations, both in positive and negative ways, it might signify that they have unresolved emotional issues. Share your observations with them and pay attention to their reaction, it will tell you whether or not they are willing to work on those issues.
Green Flags
1. You feel like you can be yourself
When you start dating, you must ask yourself how they make you feel. If you can relax in their presence, have fun and feel like you can be yourself, that’s a good sign but if you’re constantly walking on eggshells around them, they likely aren’t a good match for you.
2. They listen and ask thoughtful questions
Asking thoughtful questions, listening intently and making eye contact are signs that someone is genuinely interested in getting to know you better. If your dating partner keeps interrupting you and talking about him/herself, you might start feeling neglected as the relationship progresses and are well-advised to look someplace else for love.
3. There is mutual respect
Be sure to pay attention to how they treat the people around them, including restaurant staff, their parents, siblings, friends, exes, etc. and take note of how they deal with conflict. It will tell you a great deal about how they are going to behave toward you as soon as the initial honeymoon phase has worn off.
Oftentimes your date will display a mixture of green and red flags. In that case, it’s a good idea to ask yourself if you know what you’re looking for in a partner and if you can accept the red flags now and in the future. Following that, it is up to you to make up your mind.
For more information, check out Carolina Matchmaker’s website, Facebook and Instagram pages.
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